In this episode, Phil addresses how to navigate hate and negativity on the path to personal improvement. He talks about the necessity of resilience, setting boundaries for personal and family well-being, and ignoring the 'crab mentality' that aims to pull individuals down. Phil advises us to focus on our goals, dismiss the haters, and embrace the challenges as part of our growth process. He emphasizes self-belief, hard work, and the importance of not letting others' negativity hinder our progress when pursuing our goals in the areas of family, fitness, and finance.

Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.


Timestamps:

(01:00 ) - The Journey Out of the Crab Bucket

(03:30 ) - Why The Truly Successful Don't Tear Others Down

(05:06 ) - Navigating Hate From Those Closest to You

(07:09 ) - Mastering the Trifecta of Success

(11:57 ) - The Tough Choices on the Path to Success

(15:16 ) - The Unexpected Arrival of New Crabs

(16:28 ) - Understanding Life's Comings and Goings

(18:13 ) - Learning to Say No for the Sake of Family

(19:29 ) - Navigating the Waters of Self-Reflection and Control

(21:24 ) - Letting Go and Moving Forward


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Transcription:

[00:00:00 ] You're playing this game of life for you and your family. 

And if other people don't want to contribute to that and, you know, be part of the growth of that. 

And instead, like they want to veer you off track with like drama, you got to get used to just protecting yourself, creating those boundaries, because at the end of the day, it's you and your family's life on the line.

And the only people in this world that you owe is you and your family.

[00:00:30 ] What's going on you guys, it's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life. 

And more importantly, how I personally got through them. 

Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.

I'm here to give you the truth.

[00:01:00 ] Let's talk today about dealing with hate. 

Now, hate you can get from a lot of people in a lot of different ways, different forms. 

It can be direct, it can be indirect, it can be from people you love, people you trust, to people that you don't even know, strangers in the world.

Most people don't know how to respond to hate. 

[00:01:30 ] Most people don't know how to respond to somebody being negative towards them when all they're trying to do is change their life, to be a positive force, or to help other people. 

You're going to have to learn how to really build your resilience toward these things, because in order for you to change your life and get you to the next level, you have to be used to people that are beneath you. 

Literally, beneath you, talking to you because they have what's called a crab mentality. 

[00:02:00 ] A crab mentality happens when a person or a group of people see a limit in their life, they see themselves inside of the bucket of life and they make a decision internally and they say, “I'm never going to get out of this bucket. And I'm going to live here. I'm going to settle here.” 

And unfortunately, they also come in different forms. 

There's different types of crabs, okay?

There's the crabs that look successful on the outside. 

But internally, they still haven't personally developed where they still show hate to people.

[00:02:30 ] There's a lot of crabs that are unsuccessful, have nothing to show for it and still feel like they can judge and hate on people. 

And then there's a huge portion in between that, right? 

Where they're successful in some areas, but again, they lack in personal development, which is why they choose to project hate.

[00:03:00 ] The reason why that is is because when they see somebody trying to level up in life, trying to move up in life, trying to better their lives, it triggers in them an internal fear that they do not have the courage to do what needs to be done to change their life. 

So what they will do is they'll project onto you the same things and the same fears and the same doubts they feel about themselves in whatever capacity.

And most people don't know this. Most people don't understand that that's how these crabs work, that these people that bring you down, tear you down, that's how they work, that's how they function. 

And that's why they're always going to lose in the world and in life. 

And again, they may achieve success in the areas, but they're, they don't live the life that you want to live.

[00:03:30 ] Just always remember that nobody, nobody, nobody, I'll say nobody that is more successful than you will take time out of their day to just go to you, text you, call you, talk to you, go to your social media and spend time being hateful toward you. 

I want you to really think about that. 

[00:04:00 ] If somebody really values their time, and they're really able to make a lot of money, and they're able to live their dream life, you don't think that they'd rather spend that five minutes hating, creating negative energy in themselves, to hanging out with their family?

To playing golf, to driving their car, to reading a book, to talking to somebody higher, you don't think that somebody would actually take the time to do that. 

[00:04:30 ] The only time I've actually seen actual successful people hate, and they're like good, successful people is when somebody does something terrible, and they have to speak on it. 

They have to, they have to say things because they're called to say things because it's not right what they see. 

So they called it out. 

That's the only time I've ever seen that, but it's never, “Look at that person trying. I'm going to call them out and talk down to them because they're trying.”

Now, if they're trying in the wrong ways, again, people will have their opinion that, you know, they're doing things in the wrong ways and blah, blah, blah. 

[00:05:00 ] But the reality is, it usually doesn't happen that way. 

Usually the only people that hate on you are losing an area of their life, which is why they project onto you.

The worst part about this, guys, is that you have to be prepared for is you think that you're going to get this type of feedback, this hate, this engagement from like strangers, and you will all along the way, you're going to experience it in your careers, you're going to experience that in your businesses, you're going to experience that everywhere, all the time, forever, it's just a thing, right?

[00:05:30 ] And the worst part is when it happens from people that you love, people that you care about, people that you thought would just support you forever. 

They're the ones that would show hate and it happens indirectly, right? 

They just make weird comments. 

They don't support. 

They say they do, but you never really feel the actions.

[00:06:00 ] Sometimes they'll make little jabs at you and they'll act like they're joking, but there's an underlying tone that they're serious. 

Those are the ones that probably hurt the most. 

The strangers, you'll brush them off. 

You'll be able to, for sure. 

But when it's people you love, it kind of sucks. 

And you have to remember, as you go from where you're at in life, to get to the next level, the biggest critique that you're going to get is from yourself.

You're already going to be judging yourself harshly. 

You're already going to be looking at all your deficiencies. 

[00:06:30 ] You're already going to look at all the things that are broken with why you don't deserve success. 

You're already going to do that to yourself. 

Why stack on all of these other people, whose opinion doesn't even matter?

And it's sad to see because it really does break people. 

I can imagine why, you know, it sucks. 

It sucks wanting to change your life and not having anybody to support you. 

It sucks wanting to do the right thing. 

And like, everybody wants to bring you down or like, they're not supportive. 

[00:07:00 ] They don't give you back the same energy you're trying to put into the world when you're trying to just find your voice and sh*t, you know? 

And that sucks.

But again, that's part of the price you